Piece by piece, love Falls

Love is one of the most confusing and complex parts of life. You see, love can create excessive joy and love can bring devastating sorrow.

The mystery of love is that it can start from the tiniest glimpse into another person’s eyes, a first kiss on a first date, or a cuddle on a cold winter’s day. It can hit you quickly or slowly, and take you on a beautiful journey or perhaps a bumpy ride that comes to an abrupt halt. Too many of us miss the beautiful journey and acquire bruises and scars from the bumps and sudden end.

I’ve learned that sometimes love stops being love and falls through the cracks of an imperfect relationship. I’m not saying that the perfect relationship exists, it doesn’t. Some people are just better at noticing the changes and grasping love before it reaches the cracks. For the rest of us, I’m afraid, we don’t know it’s lost until it’s missing.

We get so caught up that we don’t realize there’s even a problem, we think that our love is strong and survivable. We think it’s the only real and true part of our lives, until it isn’t. We go blindly through our days, weeks, months, and even years thinking everything is going to be just fine. Sometimes it is, but sometimes love is slipping right through our open hands.

An argument happens, a tiny bit of love falls — we are too busy feeling our own hurt to notice that the love is being neglected. Then another disagreement, a few disappointments, followed by distrust, and small bits of love fall here and there. Littering the world around us and fading through the cracks. Pieces falling day after day and we can’t see them falling. I didn’t see them falling. Why didn’t I open my eyes and catch them, why was I so blind!?

I think that if we knew that the pieces of our love were falling, we’d desperately reach out to grab them before they made it to the cracks. Wouldn’t we hold onto them and protect them with great care? Regretfully though, too many times we don’t notice them and we let them fall as they may, without even a thought. We let the pieces fall through the cracks to that point where our love is irreparable.

It can’t be put back, it can’t be restored.

I wish I’d known, I wish I’d seen the bits of our love, of our life, falling from us.

If only we’d watched, if only we’d paid more attention to love instead of worrying about being right or being hurt. If we’d been able to see the pieces as they fell, and taken the time to catch them. Would our love have survived?

Possibly, perhaps that would have made all the difference. I believe that perhaps if I’d noticed our love was falling apart, just maybe I’d still have you. We would still be happy and you would still love me. Please forgive me, please know that I truly am sorry for not catching the pieces of our love before they fell through the cracks. I was blind, we were blind and that blindness caused you to fall out of love with me, and that will remain my biggest regret.

With all my heart,
Minna