I get lost in the pain

9696261032_146d4cb0d3_oI get lost in the pain
by Minna Von Walden

I get lost in the pain, I lose me, I lose life, I lose willpower, productivity, intentions, love, thought, everything. I find myself standing in a long empty hallway, just standing there empty in the darkness. Tucked away from every pretty beam of sunshine, tucked away, thrown away, down into the dreadfully empty darkness. The lonely emptiness, shadowy scary hallway of my depression.

It’s filled with doors, open just a crack. Just enough to taunt me. Open just enough to hear my demons calling my name. Come on, open the door, let’s talk about this. Step right in, you deserve a little more pain. The wound is almost healed, time to rip it open again. You’ll never get away from this, it’s part of you now. Come on in, let’s experience it again, let that wound bleed until you’re drained.

Long hallway. Emptiness. Shadows. “Come in”,  say my demons. “come in and feel your pain.” Lonely emptiness, shadows, darkness, the hallway of my depression.

Emptiness. My demons. Pain. I’m lost in the pain.


 

photo credit: A Girl in a Coat via photopin (license)